Susan (suegrow) wrote,
Susan
suegrow

disconnection

All of a sudden everything is so disconnected in my life. At a time when things should be falling together. I have all of this hurt inside me today, and it's a simple result of the separation between different aspects of my life... Things are happening - good things - but, I feel them and experience them alone. "It's good to have your own life still." Ok, recognized. But, sometimes there should be a mutual satisfaction from one moment or another.

I leave on Tuesday for my 8-day vacation, and I feel as though I haven't spent any time with my boyfriend in the time since he returned from his vacation. That hurts. I have an obligation today, and I wrongly assumed we'd be able to go together. He made plans in the mean time (the time between when I called him and he finally called back) - and now I have to drive an hour away alone for something that would be so much more enjoyable (for everyone involved) if he were there... On our one night to actually be together. Now we won't be until late, and then ... well - we'll just need sleep by then.

It's Vera's birthday. She's 2. I have a party to go to now.
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